Wellness Wednesday: The Habits Our Children Learn from Us and How They Shape Their Health for Life
As a health coach and social psychologist working with parents, I see firsthand how the habits we model shape our children’s relationship with food, movement, and body image. As a parent myself, I understand the desire to set a strong foundation for lifelong health while balancing the realities of a busy family life. The way we approach our own health—whether consciously or not—becomes a blueprint for our children. Science supports this: children learn through observation, and our daily habits, attitudes, and language around food, exercise, and body image can have profound effects on their future well-being.
What Are Our Habits Teaching Our Children?
Positive Habits That Foster a Healthy Relationship with Nutrition and Movement
Walking and Talking: Combining Movement with Connection
Some of the most powerful health habits are the simplest. Parents who incorporate movement into their daily lives in a natural and enjoyable way create positive associations with exercise for their children.
One example is family walks after dinner—a time to decompress, reflect on the day, and connect. This not only promotes healthy digestion and physical activity but also reinforces that movement can be a form of self-care and connection, rather than just a chore or punishment.
Another example is parking a few blocks away from school drop-off and pick-up, turning what could be a passive moment into a small but meaningful opportunity for extra steps and fresh air.
Involving Kids in Meal Prep and Grocery Shopping
Studies show that when children are involved in food preparation, they are more likely to try and enjoy healthier foods (van der Horst et al., 2014).
Simple ways to include kids in nutrition decisions:
Let them pick out fruits and vegetables at the grocery store.
Have them help wash and chop produce (with age-appropriate tools).
Create “build-your-own” meals, like taco night or salad bars, allowing them to explore different food groups in a fun way.
Modeling Balanced Eating Without Guilt
The 80/20 or 90/10 approach to nutrition teaches children that all foods can have a place in a healthy diet.
When parents demonstrate enjoying treats in moderation—without guilt or labeling foods as “good” or “bad”—it helps children develop a balanced perspective on eating.
Negative Habits That Can Lead to Unhealthy Relationships with Food and Body Image
Crash Dieting and Negative Self-Talk About Weight
Many children, especially girls, are exposed to dieting culture at an alarmingly young age. Studies indicate that by age 8, nearly half of girls have already tried dieting (Lowes & Tiggemann, 2003).
When children see parents engaging in restrictive crash diets for a wedding, vacation, or special event—often followed by self-criticism for “failing” or regaining weight—it teaches them that:
Health is only about appearance, not well-being.
Their worth is tied to a number on the scale.
Food should be feared and controlled rather than enjoyed.
Parents who constantly weigh themselves, critique their bodies in front of their children, or complain about “needing to lose weight” unknowingly pass on body dissatisfaction.
Using Exercise as Punishment Instead of Celebration
Some parents talk about working out only in the context of “burning off” food or “earning” a treat. This teaches children that exercise is transactional rather than something to be enjoyed.
Instead, shifting the language to highlight the strength, energy, and joy movement provides can change the entire perception of physical activity.
Pressuring Kids to Clean Their Plates or Restricting Foods
Forcing children to finish everything on their plate, regardless of hunger cues, can lead to overeating habits later in life (Birch et al., 1987).
On the flip side, making certain foods completely off-limits (without explaining why) can make them more desirable, increasing the likelihood of bingeing or secret eating.
Instead, teaching kids about listening to their bodies and making balanced choices fosters a healthier relationship with food.
How to Foster a Positive Relationship with Health for Your Children
Lead with curiosity, not criticism: When discussing nutrition, ask open-ended questions like, “How does this food make your body feel?” instead of labeling foods as “bad.”
Celebrate what the body can do: Frame movement around fun and function—dancing, playing sports, and exploring nature—not just burning calories.
Be mindful of language: Instead of saying, “I can’t eat that; it’s bad for me,” try, “I’m choosing this because it makes me feel good and strong.”
Create shared, enjoyable movement experiences: Go on family bike rides, have a weekend dance party, or turn chores into active games.
Practice what you preach: Your kids are watching—not just what you eat, but how you talk about yourself and your health.
Be The Healthy Role Model Your Children Need
Our children don’t just inherit our genes—they inherit our habits, our mindset, and our relationship with food and movement. By making small, mindful shifts in the way we approach health, we can create a legacy of wellness that lasts for generations.
If you're a busy parent looking to reclaim your health without extreme diets, rigid meal plans, or losing precious family time, join our Healthy Parent Program. You’ll get access to fun, effective workouts, an online community of like-minded parents, meal tracking tools, and expert guidance on modeling healthy habits for your kids—all in a way that fits your life.
Start today and build the healthy foundation your family deserves!
